Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Weekly Update-Part One

If you knew me, like really would know...I LOVE deep. I value relationships, I am shy but confrontational, I am loyal yet I set high expectations for the people in my life that could never be met. This past weekend I learned so much. With a clear head, free of  diaper changes, feeding times, or schedules I lived in the moment. I danced, I laughed, I wept for LOVE. Love of cousins, love for my husband, love of new marriages, love for our parents, love for life.

Growing up I was raised with a close knit family on my dad's side and when I was really young on my mom's side as well. An upbringing where Sunday dinners were a must. Seeing cousins was like pass the salt. Cousins were your social circle. That changed, like most childhoods do, things altered. There was a divorce and change happened. My social circles were now a new school of people I did not know and my brothers. Oh how I deeply love my brothers. They were my safe place, my constant, amidst the change. Thru this change I developed walls, armor, avoidance of my faith, and most importantly anger.


I let go. I released the anger, the resentment, the frustration from just a weekend away. There were so many moments of clarity. It became clear that my husband needs me and I need my husband. We LOVE deep. We are different, yet fit in a way that I could never describe. We challenge each other and we are each wise where the other needs us to be wise.

This weekend I experienced stranger kindness. My usual reference is from a random mom in the park who takes extra liking to my babies and shows kindness. But this weekend it was family. Family we never see, yet have an instant connection with. This weekend I experienced nurture from our parents. Nurture from my mom caring for my babies. And nurture from my in laws listening to my husband when he needs to rant...and being our constant in our crazy chaotic life. This weekend I became a different person. One who is open and social, and happy a calm. I let go of the past and am now living for my faith, my husband, my babies, and myself. Forgiveness and I are BFF's.

They are very serious about popcorn. Just look at those toes, love!

Table at the wedding we went to this weekend. So fun, more pictures to come in Part 2!

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